A Poem From Mommy

So, I've had a few people ask if I had written the last poem I put on here, well, I didn't, but it got me thinking and made me want to write one. I've never written one before, but this one just seemed to come to me. So, here it is:

Our little baby Hope,
Oh how we miss you.
I'm learning how to cope,
But how I long to hold you.

You had your mommy's toes,
But you had your daddy's too.
Now only God knows
what is best for you.

I love you more than ever,
I love your sister too.
Just can't figure out whether,
I'm okay without you.

I loved your little kicks,
Always knew you were there.
Though sometimes it makes me sick,
when I remember you there.

I always feel your presence,
I know you're watching over me.
Just can't wait to be there since,
Heaven's forever where you'll be.

I love and miss you both more than words can explain.
Love,
Mommy

Headstones are Here!

So, I just got an email that the headstones made it in on Friday. I haven't been able to go see them yet, because it's pouring rain, but will definitely be heading out there today and will make sure to put pictures of them up. I've been impatiently waiting for them to get here, though they actually got here faster than they were supposed to. I think about little Hope often. Friday was an especially hard day for me, seeing as it had been 3 months since we had her. I think about that day all the time. Sometimes I wish I could go back and live that day all over again. Though it was the hardest day of my life, I'd give anything to be with her again. I try not to think about the things I should be doing with her right now. She'd be 3 months old now, and I always wonder what she'd be like if she were here. But then again, I try not to think about that, 'cause it only makes it harder. I know she's better off where she is. Just can't help but wonder sometimes...

I apologize for not writing in a while. It's just hard to know what to say anymore. It used to be all about Hope, and now...well, it's just hard to find the words, but I'm definitely going to try and get up there and get the pictures posted for everyone to see...




....So I made it out to Memory Park to see the headstones. They're precious. The rain didn't look like it was going to stop any time soon, so I decided to go out there anyways. It was nice to finally see headstones there this time. They're in a section called "Babyland." I think about Hope and Chloe all the time. I've noticed some people don't really know what to say to me, or are scared to bring them up, but I wish it wasn't that way because I'm very proud of my little girls and I love talking about them...




"A MILLION TIMES"


You never said I'm leaving
You never said good-bye
You were gone before I knew it
And only God knew why

A million times I've needed you,
A million times I've cried.
If love alone could've saved you,
You never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place,
No one else will ever fill.

It broke my heart to lose you,
But you didn't go alone.
Part of me went with you,
The day God took you home.